Movement, as always…

So I know I said “im back!” in my last post and then…left you all hanging, again, but this time I’m back for real. Hope you all aren’t too mad at me, but somehow I think you’re surviving just fine without my weekly ramblings. And I’ll warn you, usually I try to post about things that relate to everyone’s life, just so this blog doesn’t turn into some egotistical dumping ground for uninteresting happenings in my life, but this one is pretty me-centered. I truly hope that you can relate or get something out of this other than knowledge of what’s going on with me.

So. Here’s the quick and dirty update on my life: I got hired as an intern for Solyoga trips (the coolest yoga/travel company EVER), and as a yoga instructor at Square One Yoga Collective (the coolest yoga studio in the East bay EVER). I’ve been writing a lot too, and have even gotten some articles published. Don’t read that one unless you’re okay with swearing and want to know the definition of luluWhore.

So yes, everything has been going swimmingly for me here. I spend my days teaching and practicing yoga, working and learning at Solyoga trips, rock climbing until my fingers bleed, and writing about whatever is on my mind. I’m not making a lot of money, well, actually, I’m really not making ANY money, but for right now, that’s okay.

And for all of you softies out there–yes, I am still really in love with Alex, more so than ever. Our relationship feels strong, fun, honest and supportive, despite the geographical distance between us. I love the shit out of that boy and he makes me happy all day.

My life these past few months has been exciting, creative, new, and always evolving.Β All has been well in the West.

And then, Colorado happened.

I went to visit my sister for a few days in Durango, and, as always, fell devastatingly in love with those mountains. Happens every damn time. The rock in Colorado is different: it’s dramatic, it stands out in the distance and taunts you with it’s perfection, sheer beauty, and unmistakable energy. It makes you feel different, wild somehow, and it just begs to be climbed.Β Climb me! It screams, loud enough to be heard all through the Aspen-dense valley.

God damnit. Just as soon as I start getting rooted down in the Bay Area, Colorado has to come along and be all, ohhh but wait George, look at me, I’m awesome and perfect for you and look at all these rocks I have.

Mother fucking Colorado.

As I hiked with my Dad and sister along the Animas river, I got that feeling like…yeah, this is where I want to be. And admittedly, I get that feeling from just about any place that’s beautiful and has rock, but Colorado has always been different. It’s on the top of my list of Places I’m Madly in Love With.

And yes, some of you know that when I was in Colorado I also visited Moab, Utah but I don’t want to talk about that because I’ll start crying about the fact that I’m sitting at a computer right now and I’m not there.

My heart has officially been broken by a Moabian boulder field. And I don’t wanna talk about it.

And so now, I’m faced with the same damn question I’ve had way too many times: should I move? Those of you who have read my blog from the beginning have seen that question come up for me more than once. If I go back and count it’s probably more like five times. And I’ve only been writing this blog for a little over a year.

Movement. Funny how that mindless, last-minute, slapped-on title has become nothing short of a perfect name for what I write about, for what I do, for what brings me the most blissful of joy and lands me in the most confusing of dilemmas.

I have come to realize that my passion (or should I call it a problem?) for geographical movement stems from fear. The fear of being rooted down, in any way, to a certain city or community. I’m afraid that if I settle, root, and grow in one place, that I’ll be missing out on some other experience (most likely involving the Rockies and being just a few hours drive away from Moab). Β Not having the option to hit the road running absolutely scares the shit out of me. But how am I ever going to get rooted into a yoga community, get a long term job in the future (that actually makes me money), or have a family (in the way distant future) if as soon as I start to settle down, I run for the hills (or the Rockies)?

The gypsy life is glamourous and all, but doesn’t lend well to getting this little thing called dolladolla billz, something that, even though the yoga culture doesn’t like to admit it, we all really need.

I almost wish I hadn’t discovered this about myself, just so I could keep on unknowingly being a broke dumbass who can’t stay put. God damn yoga and it’s self-realization powers.

What I need is a way to get rooted, because being rooted to certain extents is good, while still having the ability to adventure and be the movement-junkie that I am. I need balance. Well good, at least I know what I need. Or think I know.

The difference between this Holy Shit Should I Move or Not Moment and all of my other ones is that I’m actually having fun with it. I’m so grateful that I can even ask this question, that I’m at That Age, that dreaming about packing up the car and driving until I’m just a speck on the horizon is something that I can actually do.

It feels good to be where I am, confused as all hell about what I’m doing with my life and sometimes even my day, but I’m happy.

So beloved reader, if you made it this far through my me-centered post I congratulate you. I hope this post finds you happy and healthy, and I love all of your comments, messages, and emails. Keep them coming, especially if you’re just as confused as I am about what to do about all this Life bullshit.

Love always,

Georgie

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12 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Chuck Simons
    Nov 03, 2011 @ 18:47:32

    It seems to me that you pretty well have your shit together at this point in your life. Dream job, loving, supportive family, in love with your boyfriend. Keep doing what makes you happy. I believe that with your talent the money will come eventually. I don’t really know you, but my impression has been that you’re a smart, cool, talented, and good person. I’m glad things are going well for you. I loved your article that was published recently in 2 publications. I really enjoy your writing, and think that you’ll get a big break not too far in the future. You don’t have to make any life altering decisions right this minute. Good luck,and keep in mind the title of a blog entry by a very talented writer I recently read….Writers Write.

    Reply

  2. Brent
    Nov 03, 2011 @ 20:42:27

    Dang George. Sorry to be the bearer of bad (or good) news.

    At 63, I still feel the way you do a lot.

    And right, I totally blame Colorado and those folks who live there…

    Dad

    Reply

  3. Marissa Bryan
    Nov 04, 2011 @ 04:10:28

    hey…we only met briefly at the climbing wall at Southern…but wanted to tell you these last two posts pretty much summarize everything I’ve been struggling with these last couple months (I actually have a family and am working on my phd in what I know I’ll love) but the thought of movement and adventuring in the outdoors has me squirming at my desk, damn colorado and moab for being so perfect.

    Just seeing pictures of Indian creek make my hands itch to be jammed into cracks, I can’t help but smile when I look at my scarred hands, my everlasting souvenirs from the creek, and remember how passionately I loved/hated my husband for telling me tape was for wimps. We try to head outdoors most weekends, but I still keep trying to figure out how to support a two year old, live in a van, experience this awesome world…oh, and still come up with vaccines to save children πŸ™‚ Its possible right…haha.

    I love your writing, it speaks to me somehow. So, keep at it, you are very talented. I hope one day you and I both can find an almost perfect balance.

    Reply

  4. Georgie Abel
    Nov 04, 2011 @ 09:08:14

    Hey Marissa,
    Yes I remember you from Southern! And I remember your husband…what is his name again? And btw, your two year old is adorable πŸ™‚
    I’m so glad you commented, thank you. And honestly, I think you already have found the perfect balance…you have a family and a kid who is lucky to have parents that even care about the outdoors…I think that for you all, getting out on the weekends sounds like balance. It’s hard when we think…oh but we could be doing something so much more awesome than just going out on the weekends, or just doing day trips, but (and this is something I need to learn) having those options are more than most people have. I think we both already have pretty good balance, but we’re always craving more, and that’s just our nature: craving more and wondering what the next big adventure is. That’s how climbers are, and we forget that every day life can be an adventure, even bigger and more important than hauling our ass up a rock. You’re a mama, a busy one at that, and if that’s not an adventure then I don’t know what is πŸ™‚

    Reply

  5. Aimee Hughes
    Nov 05, 2011 @ 13:50:27

    I could relate to that one! Keep ’em comin’!

    Reply

  6. Marissa Bryan
    Nov 07, 2011 @ 04:15:58

    Thanks for the nice response! Hubby’s name is Wes. You are right, our balance is really pretty good. Hit up some rocks this weekend, and decided what I need to concentrate on is improving skill rather than just seeking new places/experiences. With that, I can experience the same places differently πŸ™‚ Hope you had an awesome weekend!

    Reply

  7. Becca
    Nov 17, 2011 @ 08:23:20

    Georgie – I found your blog through an article you wrote for elephant journal that had my dying laughing at my desk at work. I’m hooked – your are absolutely adorable and a very talented writer. Seriously, I’m totally inspired by you. I hope you can find the strength to “move from love and not from fear” (to quote one of my favorite bands, ALO). I am really looking forward to reading more about your adventures.

    Reply

  8. Georgie Abel
    Nov 17, 2011 @ 09:37:11

    Thanks Becca! I really appreciate your nice comment πŸ™‚

    Reply

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